Rector's Ramblings

To All My Old Friends Here

2009-04-06T15:39:37+02:00

Please take a note of my new Blog Page http://kenny-macaulay.blogspot.com/ post it in your favourites, change your links, and most importantly, keep in touch!

Kenny

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We've Moved House

2009-04-04T15:32:57+02:00

Although it may take a week or two to make it all final and satisfactory, this blog has moved to THIS ADDRESS. Apologies for the inconvenience, but we'll be up and running again soon!

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April Fools Day

2009-04-02T15:00:22+02:00

I think The Provost almost took the day with a wonderful blurb about the new "Pisckie Sign", although Canon Bayne kinda spoiled it by flagging it up clearly as an April Fool early on. Shame!

However, my very favourite ran on Fr Heron's blog... See below:

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Aftermath

2009-04-02T10:50:28+02:00

The Scotland match was a bit tinged by other agendas last night, which was a shame! Should your goalie and your captain, having arrived back from Holland at 4am on a Sunday morning, be allowed to stay up drinking in the hotel bar until 11am on Sunday? Errr. Nah. Said captain and goalie were dropped, and put on the bench last night. Acceptable? Nah! Their little asses shouldn't have hit the ground and they should have been sent home right away. In fact, I'd never let them play for Scotland again.

We did better without them anyway last night, and winning 2-1, although not a spectacular result, was comfortable, with a little bit of flair thrown in at times.

The Tartan Army have to put up with much, but we shouldn't have to tolerate a couple of prima donnas and a weak management team. My son tells me the supporters were tucked up in bed in Amsterdam long before 4am. (With whom, I'm unsure) They had to get home to the wives on Sunday, rather than party at the Cameron House Hotel!

Disgraceful after a 3-0 defeat anyway!

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Tears Again?

2009-04-01T17:17:06+02:00

Off to see Scotland now in World Cup Qualifier. Why does it have a "Good Friday" feel about it?

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If This is True it's a Cracker!

2009-03-31T19:04:34+02:00

Outside Bristol Zoo there is a car park where cars and
coaches can park.

There was also a nice bloke with a hat and ticket machine charging cars
and coaches . This parking attendant worked there for about 25 years ,
then one day didn't turn up for work...

Ho hum say Bristol Zoo management-
Better phone up Bristol City Council and get them to send a new parking
attendant......

Err no say the Council...That car park is your responsibility...

Err no say Bristol Zoo the attendant was employed by you wasn't he....
Err NO!!!!

Sitting in his villa in Spain is a bloke who had been taking the car park
takings for Bristol Zoo for the last 25 years...

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Blog Hosts

2009-03-31T10:53:37+02:00

I think it's about a year now, of being dissatisfied and sometimes grumpy, over Blog.co.uk. Spurred on by Eamonn, who suggested that I'd be able to import the current blog into another one, I set off yesterday to begin a new blog with Wordpress. Not sure I want to go on with that now!

The Wordpress back page I'm finding difficult to cope with, and maybe I'm just thick or something, but things seem to be much more complicated.

It has also become apparent that all of the stuff in this blog will need to be jettisoned, and I don't know if I want to lose it all. Tough, tough decision!

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Holy Week and Days to Come

2009-03-31T10:38:40+02:00

It's at times like these that your local clergy begin to panic. Holy Week looms large and panic sets in. Am I prepared? Do I have all the bits and bobs, from palm crosses through to Paschal Candle and incense grains. All the plans, grand as they were, for this year after last Holy Week have maybe been watered down a little. Will people come? How much can we be ecumenical without losing some of our wonderful liturgical moments as we pass through this week.

Yes, I panic! The last meeting of the Lent Study Group tonight brings it home that Holy Week and Easter are on my doorstep, chapping to get in...

However, a day at a time from now on, and everything seems to work out OK.

Now, where did I store the Vigil Candles from Christmas-time? Do I need to buy some more? Will they remember flowers for the Altar of Repose on Maundy Thursday? O Lord.....

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Joined up Thinking

2009-03-29T19:07:05+02:00

Thinking and praying through the compilation of this morning's sermon, I suppose I had a little epiphany. It was when I started following the line that the Greeks, outsiders, marginalised, were being included in The Kingdom, that my thoughts turned to this.

Do we welcome gay people in the SEC? Well, it seems that we do and we don't. If you are gay, in a same sex relationship, you cannot be a bishop. The Church will bless a same-sex union, as long as you don't invite the bishop to officiate, or even have him/her present.

Talk about mixed messages?

Ashamed of myself, today, for supporting this line of thinking. Same-sex unions are either right or they are wrong, so I'm "coming out" today and changing my mind. This state of affairs is really unsupportable. Let's go for it and take on Akinola and his crew. If it's of God, which I believe it is, then it will be alright in the end and we'll survive the flak!

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Oh No!

2009-03-29T01:26:44+01:00

With current activity it seems that the SA has brought another mouse home. The dogs can't be bothered, but the SA and I know where it is hiding! Bed & breakfast?

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Holland 3 Scotland 0

2009-03-28T23:45:23+01:00

Well it was expected eh? The Dutch are a world-class outfit, but for the first 30 Minutes, we held our own, and should have scored ourselves. A switch off defensively, and a cruel goal past the time added on meant that we went in to the interval 2-0 down. The Scots played well with a very weakened team and actually scored a really decent goal which was disallowed by a French referee for some reason. Giving a penalty to Holland two minutes later was the killer.

We were outclassed tonight. However, with a bit more luck, we could have had a result.

Team UK? No thanks!

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Another Shocking Revelation

2009-03-27T21:29:59+01:00

This was photographed tonight in a pub in the Red Light district of Amsterdam. Not sure why my son is there, but glad to see a Nil fan has been there before him!

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Episcopal Church May Be Christian - Shock!

2009-03-27T20:50:53+01:00

You read it first HERE!

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So Moved

2009-03-27T15:38:14+01:00

Sometimes words hit you like a brick. I was moved today to find this BLOG.

A poem from the blog is worth reading:

If there was a pill that could make me straight

…..Straight in body

…..Straight in mind

…..Straight in heart

……....I would not take it.

If taking such a pill would restore all my lost friendships

…..And regain my parents pride

…..And give back my families respect

…..…..I would not take it.

If taking such a pill would return me to my former ministry

…..And the admiration of the congregation

…..And the loving welcome of the church

…..…..I would not take it.

If taking such a pill would replace the love I have for my wife with an equal love for a man

…..And we could legally marry

…..And we would be granted full rights under the law without fighting for them

…..…..I would not take it.

If taking such a pill would mean no one would reject me for being who I am

…..And for saying what I believe

…..And for standing boldly as one who follows Christ

…..…..I would not take it.

If taking such a pill could take the world back in time,

…..Before I came out of the closet,

…..Before I said I was gay

…..Before I knew I was gay

…..Before inequality touched me

…..Before hate revealed its ugliness to me

…..Before anyone rejected me

…..Before anything was lost to me

…..Before I ever questioned God’s love for me

…..…..I would not take it.

If taking that pill would make me straight

…..And famous

…..And wealthy

…..And talented

…..And adored

…..And beautiful

…..And thin

……....I would not take it.

……....I. Would. Not. Take. It.

I would never take a pill that would make me straight because

……....I love being who I am

……....I love being whole and free

……….I love seeing the world from where I stand

……....I love knowing God from this place

……....I love feeling passion burning in me for equality

……....I love being part of a people who are courageous and relentless

……....I love being one in Spirit with every queer youth

…………..With every gay man and woman

……………With every bisexual man and woman

…………..With every transman and transwoman

……………With every ally and friend

……………With everyone who questions, doubts and searches

……….And I love being one in Spirit with you

……………Bound in hope, and faith, and love

……………Bound in God

If there was a pill I could take that would make you straight

………..And taking that pill would end all your confusion and anxiety

……….And remove your fear that God has rejected you

……………I would not take that pill even for you.

You are gay.

…..You are not wrong.

…..…..You are not sinful.

…..…..…..You are not evil or perverted.

…..…....…..…You are not unworthy.

…..…..…..…..…..You are not a mistake.

…..…..…..…..…..…..You are not to be ashamed.

You are gay.

…..God loves you.

…..…..God holds you.

…..…..…..God stands with you.

…..…..…..…..God delights in you.

…..…..…..…..…..God calls you “My own.”

If there was a pill that could make me straight

…..And make you straight

…..And you

……....I would not take it.

……....I. Would. Not. Take. It.

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When the Cat's Away.....

2009-03-27T10:06:19+01:00

I dropped the RW off at the airport early this morning. She's off to Welsh Wales to visit her son/sister & brother-in-law, leaving Archie, Peanut and the staring Toastie, (along with the Silent Assassin), to look after me!

I think of the bliss of a weekend on my own.... yes, I actually DO enjoy my own company... and then have a quick look at my diary, and realise that any serious "play" would be consigned to an hour this afternoon, and maybe a couple of hours on Sunday after services, before she returns on Sunday evening. So much for plans to paint the town red!

I was going to put some time aside to go for Morris Dancing Classes, so that I could feel a bit more in-tune with my English brothers, and have a bit more empathy with their culture, but that's out the window now.

I'll need to prepare myself for the Dutch knocking at least five goals past Scotland tomorrow instead. It's worse than Partick Thistle Nil. Going to Amsterdam with around 10 call-offs from the squad is just suicidal! Do you think those who called off know something?

My son is off to Amsterdam to watch. Through his fingers probably!

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April Magazine

2009-03-26T20:52:03+01:00

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For MadPriest

2009-03-26T20:44:07+01:00

After heated exchanges about Scottish "racism", I share, with bated breath, an advert seen in The Diary of today's Herald!

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Las Vegas Churches accept Gambling Chips

2009-03-26T15:41:42+01:00

THIS MAY COME AS A SURPRISE TO THOSE OF YOU NOT LIVING IN
LAS VEGAS , BUT THERE ARE MORE CATHOLIC CHURCHES THAN CASINOS.

NOT SURPRISINGLY, SOME WORSHIPERS AT SUNDAY SERVICES WILL GIVE CASINO CHIPS RATHER THAN CASH WHEN THE BASKET IS PASSED. SINCE THEY GET CHIPS FROM MANY DIFFERENT CASINOS, THE CHURCHES HAVE DEVISED A METHOD TO COLLECT THE OFFERINGS..

THE CHURCHES SEND ALL THEIR COLLECTED CHIPS TO A NEARBY FRANCISCAN MONASTERY FOR SORTING AND THEN THE CHIPS ARE TAKEN TO THE CASINOS OF ORIGIN AND CASHED IN.

THIS IS DONE BY THE CHIP MONKS

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Someone Reads the Parish Magazine!

2009-03-26T01:10:30+01:00

Seen at the Concert tonight featuring the Faslane Wind Band:

At least somebody reads the Mag!

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Traumatised

2009-03-26T01:07:24+01:00

The RW is traumatised tonight after finding the perfectly formed body of a dead rabbit under the dining room table. No head. Just the body. (Perhaps the head will be on my pillow tonight) She bravely grabbed a plastic bag, picked it up by the tail, and put it in the bin. We know you are supposed to pick these things up by the ears, but sadly the ears were gone. (With the head).

I suppose the Silent Assassin feels her kills have to be much more impressive these days, with Archie now resident, but this is somewhat OTT.

We have an interesting relationship with the SA and Archie. He tries to eat her, and she tries to shred his nose with the sharpened claws. Eventually they'll tire of this, or I'll end up in the Asylum.

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Training Courses

2009-03-25T18:41:30+01:00

As you may know, the RW is being taken to training classes. I think she should go to Fr Heron's where more practical methods are addressed.

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Is it Me???

2009-03-25T15:36:43+01:00

There comes a point when you have to ask yourself that question! I've managed to fall out with three good people in the past 24 hours. Of course, every one of them was wrong and I was right. Still am! However, you need to ask yourself, when these things keep happening to you... is it possibly me?

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Retirement

2009-03-24T16:47:58+01:00

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No Team GB!

2009-03-24T16:21:55+01:00

There is a cause out there worth fighting for! Moves are afoot to enter a Great Britain Football Team into the next Olympics! How can this be? Since the game began, we invented it, there have been four different Associations, Engerlund, Wales, Northern Ireland, and of course Scotland. The other footballing nations have constantly called this into question, and some have moved to allow only one team to represent the UK.

We, the Celtic nations, (not Engerlund), have vigorously opposed this with success. Now Lord Coe, who said "F*** Them!" when Scotland Wales and Ireland refused to give in to having a UK team at the Olympics, wants to just go ahead anyway. It's the thin end of the wedge and I'm surprised and more than a little upset that Gordon Brown seems to be supporting him!

We all know what Team GB means. A squad of 19 English players with a token Scot, and maybe someone from Wales and Ireland so we don't get too upset.

The Scottish Footballing Nation have a history and a pride that will not be taken from us. We will fight to the end to save us from being swallowed up by smarmy Big Brother down south.

"Freedom!"

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Insurance

2009-03-24T16:03:16+01:00

Those following this Blog will have noted that the gable end of the tenement. next door, fell through the church roof, but we have been told, verbally, that we are not covered by our insurance policy.

I got the official letter today which is quite succinct! Amongst other things, it says:

"Although one of the insured perils is impact, this is only impact caused by vehicles, animals, or articles falling from aircraft."

In other words.... if a coo had fallen oot a plane and come through your roof you would have been covered!

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The Long Stare

2009-03-24T14:03:11+01:00

I often catch the oldest dog, poor Toastie, just staring at me. It's always a long stare, the other pets have gone to lie in their corners, and there is Toastie, staring, and I often wonder what he's thinking, if dogs really think at all.

I suppose I bestow human gifts upon him.... empathy for one, or is he just trying to weigh up my current mood? He knows me so well, my ups and downs, my elation and desperation, and seems terribly empathic to them all.

Today, it's desperation. My pills seem to be having a funny effect on me, I'm feeling down, and Toastie stares, silently saying, "I'll come and hug you if you like!" Or is he just weighing up his chances of getting a fly biscuit or a chew of a used tissue?

Why am I down anyway? Count the blessings, Kenny! However many they are, and they are legion really, it's the negatives that are creeping into my consciousness and taking control. My dad's frailty and his future. The fact we have no relationship at all now, of any worth. My sense of failure to have done or achieved much, due to years of alcoholism. The way I perceive people think of me: a fool, an ass, holding on in life by the skin of my teeth. The sinking realisation that I'm never going to do things I would have liked to do, as wasted years have left it all too late.

I guess it's wilderness experience. The wilderness of Lent and the experience of the Cross.

And I know that resurrection will come and that I will not always feel like this.

Meanwhile, Toastie stares on.

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Googlemaps

2009-03-23T21:01:11+01:00

Smashing stuff here, but this one must have been taken at a strange time! There are spaces in the car park next door!

Out of date, now. The hall has now gone!

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Tribute to Denis Law!

2009-03-23T17:21:19+01:00

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Good Advice

2009-03-23T13:06:54+01:00

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Some Truths

2009-03-23T10:59:06+01:00

MadPriest gives us some insights on what's going on outwith the Scottish Church. What would happen to us if Akinola and his crowd were to be translated into the Scottish College of Bishops? There may be one or two rather nice Scottish Charges which would become vacant overnight! And a few funerals to attend too!

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